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Heres what weknow about the checks.
The statement framed the massive cash distribution as an efficiency dividend resulting from the departments cost-cutting measures since January.
Every registered Republican will receive exactly one million dollars.
Numbers are just, like, suggestions, he said.
How well pay for this is up in the air.
Registration Frenzy
Voter registration offices nationwide have reported being overwhelmed following the announcement.
That number is only expected to go up as news of the payout spreads.
Political Reaction
Republican lawmakers praised the initiative.
Its right there in the Constitution life, liberty and a million bucks if you vote the right way.
Democrats, meanwhile, have responded with predictable outrage.
Implementation Questions
The specifics of how DOGE plans to distribute these funds remain murky at best.
Musk suggested the payments would be made via a combination of Dogecoin and X credits.
Republicans who are seeking to get their stimulus in U.S. dollars may remain disappointed.
This article is entirely satirical and was published on April 1, 2025.
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